sum.na

Are you looking for our page on Katharine McPhee? If so click here please!

Unbuttoned by withdrawal, from Flickr
From the “I swear I aint making this up” dept..

And.. just when I thought my search logs couldn’t get any weirder.. Here’s the latest..

1. (From India): Cockroaches inside the underwear for pleasure (SIC)- I’m honestly not sure where to even begin here. I’m sorry, for the first time in a long time, I simply don’t know how to answer this question. So.. over to the blogosphere. Can anyone help me? maybe some of my esteemed colleagues can shed light on this issue.
2. Lisa Tucker Undies - Lisa Tucker is the sweet 16 year old on American Idol. Before you start exploring her underwear (I hope this question isnt from the person above) I will point out that she’s 16.
3. Womans rights pictures - I’m sure they are fascinating. Try Flickr?
4. Men have intercourse with cats - OK. I’ll be the first to admit that some men are odd. But.. intercourse with cats? Thats just not natural. If it’s any consolation to you, a sudanese man was forced to marry a goat
5. Hottest Idol American - well considering the unnatural curiosity some have about Lisa Tuckers underwear.. hmm… I’d say she’s a good candidate. She and Katharine McPhee
6. Girls don’t wear no underwear - they don’t? Not even a thong? That IS worrying.
7. Welcome to India where the cows eat Hey - crazy as it may sound, thats actually lyrics from a song…
8. Girlfriend in Sinhala - I take it you are asking how to say girlfriend in sinhala. Honest answer.. I don’t know. Can someone here help me with this?
9. Can scanner scan things like bags and chicks - I’m not sure if you would be able to fit Scarlett Johanssen in a modern flat bed scanner.. but I’m willing to try.. Scarlett… call me?
10. How people make bricks in Sri Lanka - We used to have this highly ritualistic procedure involving semi naked men and singing, but now there are brick making machines…
11. American influence in Sri Lanka - it’s everywhere. KFC, Idol, Apprentice, House MD.. yup.. good old America is having a profound effect on our civilization…
12. What happens when you don’t wear a seatbelt bad bad things happen. Trust me. Wear the seatbelt. It’s the law. At least, it should be.
13. Sri Lankan girl names - heres a good link.
14. Sri Lanka national costume - its white, and folks at parliament wear it. Enough said.
15. How do you say lady in Hindi?.. not sure I think it is Ladki
16. Women punish testicles india… They do.. uh oh. remind me not to mess with Indian chicks!
17. Call girls in Sri Lanka. Sure. lots of companies here have call centers. I hear outsourcing is the next big thing

That’s all folks! (For now at least… )

So, here are the best questions from my search logs, together with my feeble attempts to answer them Feb:

1. I’m doing research on SMS Lingo: Well.. Local sms’s are full of annoying acronyms like U, Wot, Ur, and so on. See sms lingo list and transl8it
2. I hate virgins: See the january faq on Virgins and other odd things…
3. Rural trivia india: Try this site on India Trivia, also Yahoo has a category for Indian trivia
4. I want Lanka Pussy Photo:
   Ok, here goes:
   
   An excellent photo by imagebang
5. Ways to wear a sari: well, Oprah wore one over her jeans
6. I want secret relationship with Sri Lankan Ladies: Tell me, why secret? wouldn’t it be much more fun to have a messy very public so that the gossip tabloids can run feature length interviews with your victim significant other afterwards?
7. Draught cattle Sri Lanka: As far as I know, nobody here (even when bored) has  attempted to play draughts checkers using cows. However some of our kings of yore, were pretty odd, so you never know…
8. Effects of reality television: In a word, bad. Here are some photos of innocent people who were victims of reality TV:
   
   And there I was, happily strolling along until suddenly, I’m on Tickle Cam. OMG. I’m scarred for life.
   
   Ohh.. the horrow. from that famous reality TV show Honey I shrunk your breasts
   
   This innocent girl was victim of that long running TV reality show “When Good Dentists Go Bad”.
9. Holy cows of India:
   
   Now Just a minute! I’l have you know all cows are holy! Not just Indian cows.
10. Poking sleeping cows: I guess this goes in the same category as tipping cows. Say, what is it with you people? Where do you guys come up with these weird searches?
    
    Go ahead, make my day.
11. english sex mined ladies: Do you mean an English lady with sex on the mind? Hmm let’s see:
    
    Young man, I’ll have none of that nonsense in my empire. Now can we have some tea and scones?
    
    And this is victoria beckham. I’m not sure if she’s a sex minded english lady, but she has a nice ass used to be a great singer

More cool stuff coming up soon… in part 2 of the FAQ!

Hello Everyone.

As part of my community outreach service, I’ve decided to answer all the questions in my search logs, as best as I can. So here goes:

Q. (From Canada) Do guys hate sleeping with virgins?.
Well, actually, in India and Sri Lanka, I have heard that some men prefer their brides to be virgins when they get married.. So much so that they insist on proof or something. But this is an old outmoded view, most modern dudes prefer that the girl be adept in the art of the Kamasutra and able to do the Leapfrog or Cowgirl.

Q. Where can I find Sri Lankan Girls?
OK, thats an excellent question. Due to the ethnic conflict pathetic economy, the Sri lankan diaspora, is now.. a diaspora. In other words, Sri Lankans have immigrated far and wide, and you are likely to find them just about anywhere on earth, except here.

If you really need to find a girl from Sri Lanka, perhaps the easiest option would be to, er., come to Sri Lanka, as this country is full of them.

Q. Where can I find Sri Lankan BoyZ?
See above. Replace ‘girls’ with ‘boys’.. or.. er.. BoyZ

Q. I wan’t a Sri Lankan Girlfriend/Girls for a lonely guy in Sri Lanka
A. Get a ticket to Sri Lanka, brush up on your conversational skills bring a lot of money, and start hunting. Lots of girls will like you. Especially if you have a nice personality money.

To Lonely Guy in Sri Lanka. Well you could hang around at MC and hurl compliments at random passerbys and hope one of them falls deeply in love with you. Kidding.

Q. I wan’t Lanka Sari Live Movie
A. Is there such a movie? I’ve never heard of it, sad to say

Q. Tell me about crimes and punishment in Sri Lanka
A. We have a judicial system.. Based on ancient English law I think. If you like, consider reading the Daily news sri lanka which is full of Moral Stories about people who Ran Afoul Of The Law and were Vigorously Punished…

Q. Whats the Hindi/Sri Lankan  word for Underage?/I want a School Girl
A. Naturally, you are asking this for your research project, not because you are a dirty old man. I don’t know about Hindi, but I think running after underage girls in Sri Lanka is refered to bala aparada. (Bala = Young? Underage? Aparada = crime?)

Think “Jail Bait” in the American sense

Does your mummy know what you search for online? Google has recently been contacted by the US government, and requested turn over search logs for terms such as underage and so on. So, If I were you, I’d wash my keyboard and never search for such shocking things again.

Q. Tell me about Japanese car theft in Sri Lanka
A. Well, as far as I know, the Japanese don’t steal our cars. They have no reason to, as they have better things to do here, like being tourists. That and the average Japanese person earns in a day what most Sri Lankans earn in an year.

On a side note, Hondas and Toyotas are popular targets for auto theft in USA.

Q. Paranormal Strange RSS Comments.
A. Er. ?..

Q. Tittilate Me!
A. Er. ??

Q. Tell me about Sri Lankan Kandyan Sari
A. Well, I asked a girl I know about this. She said there are two ways to wear a Sari. Either the Indian style, or Kandyan way. According to her there are some small differences, to do with the ‘pota’ (the bit that is draped). I will tell you more as I get more information.

Q. I want Sri Lankan Pussy
A. Er.. OK if you say so. You can find cats all over the streets of Sri Lanka. But beware. Some of them have Rabies